Over the past few Fridays, Indiana Jones movies have been playing. A couple of weeks ago was Raiders Of The Lost Ark, Temple of Doom last week, Last Crusade was on Friday to make way for the most recent installment premiere on normal TV.
I consider the first three films pure entertainment, pure masterpieces, infact, i consider Raiders Of The Lost Ark my equal favourite movie of all time, and for people who know me, know thats a big call (hint, i watch alot of movies). Anyways, the first three films share their own section of my heart like many fans around the world. They are just great films and Harrison Ford IS Indiana Jones and pretty much every guy (some girls too) would LOVE to be him.
Anyways, as you know the 4th film, Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull came out in 2008 to the cries of millions of fans. Despite the obvious hype this kind of movie can gather over 19 years since the previous installment, the film really was a disappointment. I never really wrote my thoughts about it then, but it seems a good a time as any to write it now.
I expected a disappointment myself when i saw it, but i didn’t think the film would be as bad as it was, AND HECK, i enjoy the film. There is alot of cool things i found within it. I thought the beginning re-introduction to the character was actually excellent, it was different to the others, reminded why we love Indy, even though he is older than he was, still kicking ass and getting in strife. AND YES, I LIKED THE NUKED FRIDGE, aka the new “jumping the shark” but i found that to be crazy/nice touch in the tradition of inflatable-boat-out-of-plane. Other than the stupid critters, the opening i found very solid.
Also solid, was academic Indy re-introduction, covering what he was up to in that time, the people he lost. As well as the introduction scenes of Mutt (despite not being to excited about his character) and the following bike/car chase. The film was building up well. Pretty much by the time Indy and Mutt were caught at the gravesite by the Russians the film went over the waterfall drowning in the shitness and wasted opportunities, with only a few moments of fresh air.
Marion was wasted, plain and simple, and she was there because of nostalgia sake, her character did very little but avert Indy’s gaze sometimes, and drive a truck. She should have had more layers, maybe introduced earlier.
The chase scenes through the jungle were bombarded with CGI (one of the films ongoing problems), Ray Winstone’s character Mac, becomes increasingly ridiculous and confusing, Mutt Williams gained WAY WAY WAY too much screentime over Indy (one of the biggest sins, not to mention that AWFUL monkey moment), the natives at the temple were wasted, they could have made some nice conflict, but they get machine-gunned…pfft.
The ants scene i thought was nice, WHY, cause Indy got screentime beating the big-ass Russian, screw the ants, it was the fight i liked.
And ill just skip to the climax, skull comes back, Cate Blanchett dies from CGI to the head…*facepalm*. Just a big fail when all the other main deaths were so unique and epic. I think they were like, lets try the Raiders ending with CGI, see if it works…stoopard…and the Aliens…sorry inter-dimentional beings….space between spaces, STOOOOOOOPARD.
And the final marriage scene, that initially put me off, but i think itd be apt to the idea of the film and Indy deserves happiness, however how will it bode for a sequel, not sure, and Mutt, don’t you dare touch that hat.
In the end, too many careless mistakes, the best thing in it was Harrison Ford as he IS Indy however that Mutt character stealing his screentime was a big no-no. It seemed like half a good film, half rushed to the bank. WAY. TOO. MUCH. CGI. Waste of a good mythology, stupid aliens, where the surprise? OH and something not OFT said, John Williams, what an unmemorable score, in comparance, hardly the worst thing, but as a music fan, i felt deprived!
Anyways, thats my thoughts on the 4th film. Reason im writing this, like many bloggers, i thought i should provide my two cents on what should and should NOT be in the 5th movie, a movie i would LOVE to happen, and HOPE theyd get it right, if not, it won’t hurt, more Indiana at least, and we still have the first three. But it’d be excellent to close out the series as nice as it was in 1989.
So here are some things to consider in my opinion:
1) Focus on Indy - don’t give Mutt as much time as him
Again, one of the biggest sins of KOTCS was focusing too much on Mutt taking away Indy screentime. No one is there for Mutt Williams, save for those random LaBeouf fans. This is an Indy film, and we are there to see Harrison Ford be Indiana Jones.
2) Choose a good Maguffin, with great mythology and history.
It goes without saying but the crystal skulls had great potential to be awesome, with a host of historical information around them that could have lead them somewhere awesome. Anyways it would be good to see something well documented.
One of my favourite post film stories came from the Lucasarts games point and click games, being Indiana Jones And The Fate Of Atlantis, in which Indy went in search of the lost city of Atlantis. It would have been perfect for a movie, plently of puzzles, great enemy, went to many interesting places with some interesting characters, but most of all, the Maguffin was a place, which i think would be an interesting change of pace. Sure, you can’t do Atlantis, sadly, but something along those lines could be interesting.
3) Ease down on the 1950s B-movie stuff.
As much as i love B-movies, it is just wrong for Indy. The outragious silly aspects, the aliens, the cheesiness. Sure alot of those aspects are already there in the other three, but in KOTCS it became too much. As well as changing the look.
4) EASE WAY DOWN ON CGI.
Sure i understand the use of some things, its filmmaking today afterall. But monkey vine swinging sequences, the ants? Come on, use the real thing! Or matte paintings. They have all the money in the world, so no need to use the whole cost-effective excuse for CGI.
5) Give Indy more puzzles/tombs/traps
I find it hard to remember much of any of these things. There was that horizontal moving disc they solved quick smart, Oxley’s floor writings and the sand thingy. It seemed very sparse in comparance to the others. Try make something that will really make Indy scratch his head or freak out. Closing tunnels, creepy crawlies, just cool stuff that helped grow the love of the other three.
6) Cast a memorable, powerful villian/with added excellent death.
Cate Blanchett is a fantastic actress, and looked great. But did very little other than use a thick accent and scowl. Wasted talent, and she died from CGI to the face. Get a villian, doesn’t have to be a star who will really challenge Indy, push his buttons and make us cheer when he or she dies, which, must be unique and awesomely gruesome.
7) Have a colourful, exciting score.
I am a huge music fan, and as i said before, John Williams’ score was very unmemorable. While the other three had layered exciting scores, each different to the other, KOTCS was made up of recycles and alot of dull cues. It had its moments, but it really was a step down from the previous efforts.
8) George Lucas, let Steven Spielberg do his thing.
Means exactly that. Sure, you are a fantastic story writer, but when you get your hand in everything, it gets abit too much. You got Spielberg into doing your B-movie with the fourth. Now let him take control and end the series as respectfully as Last Crusade did.
9) Don’t mess with Indy.
What isn’t broke, don’t fix it. Don’t go messing with the formula, don’t make him pass the franchise to Mutt, don’t poke his eye out like he has as a 93 year old man in Young Indiana Jones Chronicles. Just give him another adventure.
10) Don’t go Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor
I hear one of the rumours was China or Mongolia. If you have seen the third Mummy movie, you can see what not to do. No martial arts, no stupid CGI, no, ugh…just don’t be like that piece of shit.
11) Try do more practical action sets.
Again, another CGI thing. Try to be practical and memorable, be it just a badass messy fight scene.
12) Try and get Lawrence Kasdan to write.
He wrote Raiders. He also helped write The Empire Strikes Back and Return Of The Jedi. He also directed some solid films: Body Heat, The Big Chill, Silverado etc. He helped create the voice, the world of Indiana Jones and today he seems to have fallen on hard times, not directing since the awful Dreamcatcher and helped write the remake to Clash Of The Titans. I think with the right company, being, Lucas and Spielberg, he can write something excellent worthy to bookend the series. While you’re at it, bring back Tom Stoppard!
13) Take Indy places.
The last film, he travelled pretty much two places, North and South America. Let him travel the world finding this thing, take him new places, on a wild journey all over the world. It’d be interesting.
14) End it well/send Indy off aptly.
Like riding off into the sunset, but not, theyve already used that. But end it well.
15) No random silly shit.
Random monkey swinging sequences, desert moles/chipmunks, Star Wars quoting.
16) Don’t set up Mutt Williams adventures.
Seriously, that would be awful and a big smelly crap on the faces of all fans.
17) Give Marion more to do.
It was wonderful to see her back, but let her do something more than smile and drive a truck.
Anyways, that’s all i have for the moment. But yeah, i am a huge fan, and this blog may be just another fan wasting his time writing an opinion piece on what should be done. Who really knows if the 5th installment will make it to film, if it doesn’t, we still have 3 great films, and a 4th, despite its sins, i believe will grow on people in time. A 5th installment done right is something worth hoping for though. Any excuse to bring the glory of Indiana Jones back is great, but it really must be done right. I just hope it would be better than the 4th. One final Indiana Jones adventure!
